When I first started to dance I was the oldest in the class! In fact, throughout my learning dance I have always been the oldest in dance class (or at least one of).

I was 17 years old when I entered an audition for a dance showcase in high school and got in without having had any training! I was subsequently encouraged by my gymnastics teacher to take dance lessons. So when I reached the ripe old age of 18 and my parents asked me, “What gift would you like for your 18th birthday, money for driving lessons or for dance lessons?”, I gave an emphatic, “Dance lessons!”. I didn’t know then what a life changing decision this was.

I went to speak to Anna Kukurba who was one of the best teachers in Cagliari at that time, her background was as a Prima Ballerina in Kraków and Paris Ballet. She asked how old I was, and without even looking at my existing (or non existent) dance skills, she said, “Come and Join the adult intermediate ballet class.”. So I did.

It didn’t take long for her to realise I had not done any dance before and at the end of the class she told me I had to downgrade and join the academy classes with the 12 year olds! Ouch! That was a shock, but I listened to her and decided she new better, so I went. But I also listened to something else she said, “You’re already too old to be a ballet dancer.”. That was the first year.

The second year she offered me not only to join her as an assistant in her classes (my parents had funds only for one year of dance lessons), but she created a solo for me to dance at the end of year show at the Conservatoire of Music in Cagliari. That was a great encouragement and I realised I had to go and study dance full time, so I decided to leave Cagliari to come to London.

In London

Time and time again I noticed that my age appeared to be a burden, I was older (relatively) and the students in the dance classes I went to were very talented and very young. Every time I went to an audition I realised that I didn’t have enough training to get the job and I saw I was still a long way from getting to that level.

Three years into studying in London and working at the same time, I was encouraged by a teacher at The Place to take up full time dance studies. So I auditioned for various schools and having been awarded a local authority grant, went to study at Middlesex University, still with the desire to become a professional dancer one day.

Once again I had in the back of my mind the idea that I was the oldest in the classroom and no matter how dedicated I was I had the preconceived notion that there wouldn’t be much of a job for me once I came out of school.

Once I graduated I started to dance for independent dance companies and enjoyed this. After some time one of them offered work with older adults. Dancers received training to work within elderly care settings.

I began working with frailer older people with various medical conditions, but I noticed too that their carers reinforced the idea that old age and deficiency went hand in hand. “You are too old to________”, was the underlying thinking, and some carers kept the elders wrapped in cotton wool. They would often say to me “You can’t do this.” or “You can’t do that!” with them. The training I was receiving said the same thing, don’t do this or that. But in the back of my mind I had the notion that the elders I was teaching could be encouraged to explore or do more than what we were supposed to teach them.

A bit of rebellion…

So the rebellious side of me took over, I started changing the exercises, using my dance training to bring creative ideas in, to challenge, stimulate and encourage the participants to do more. We even played football (with a soft ball of course) and to my amazement their competitive side started to come out. There was laughter, there was vitality and the participants wanted to be involved in the activity much more than when they had to do standard “exercises”.

At that time, I was asked to teach a ballet class to Sadler’s Wells’ Company of Elders, little did I know that this would take me on toward a new direction.

As I taught the elders from Sadler’s Wells I started to realise a very important and new idea. I was teaching similar age groups of people at the Company of Elders as I was in care homes but in very different settings. One was the sedate day-care centre the other was in inspiring venues with active older people learning how to perform. So I asked myself, “Why is it that these people of similar age and abilities behave differently?”. And it was striking that in many respects it was their behaviours that seemed different rather than their actual physical condition.

The Company of elders were active, wanting to move and challenge themselves whilst the elders from the care centre were barely interested in taking part in a simple exercise class. There was clearly a difference in their mind set.

I was so inspired by them that I realised one very important thing (both as teachers and individuals). There is a need to shift our fixed ideas about ageing and being old. It was no longer a conversation about deficiency and inadequacy. It was a conversation about possibility! A conversation about what is present rather than what we imagine/preconceive to be present. Are we really looking at what is present? Do we really understand what’s possible even in the midst of deficiency or decay?

I was no longer looking at people as “old”, but as individuals and what they brought with them.

This meant I could no longer apply my (or any body else’s) idea of what it meant to “be old”. Now age became unimportant because it was each person’s current physical state and mindset that determined what they did/or were capable of. Yes it’s true that as we pass through the years of life there are parts of our body that decay, parts of our functioning system that simply stop functioning and many of us will also experience (more or less) some sort of damage along the way. BUT it is also clear that many of these changes do not stop us from doing the things we want to do.

I have students who “struggle” into class after multiple hip operations (yet turn up for a performance raring to go), students who continue dancing into the late stages of dementia and others who fight through various forms of cancer (some successful some not) while continuing to dance.

The new generation of dancers.

As a year went by I was asked to become Sadler’s Wells’ Company of Elders’ Rehearsal Director and there I made the decision to leave the care setting to focus on active ageing. A few years later I created my own dance company, Counterpoint Dance. I was very excited about working with a fresh slate, looking at developing a new mindset of the dancer’s potential.

At the same time I was introduced to the ITM school of Alexander technique. One of the first things the head of the course, Don Weed, said was: “All I want you to do is to change everything about yourself.”. I found that statement deeply unsettling! What did he mean? If I change everything about myself does that mean I won’t be myself anymore? There is nothing wrong with who I am am!

But as I went through the course I realised that who I was at that time was not who I potentially could be. All the learned behaviours, the fears, the preconceived ideas of how to do things, I realised where misplaced.

I understood that what society, school, parenting had taught me was limiting me. Only when I had let go of some of the preconceived ideas of who I ought to be, I was able to tap into new very powerful and life changing ideas.

The change I was making to my mindset helped me ask the questions: What does ageing really mean? Is it true that when we reach a certain age we move towards a state of being which is in decline and therefore we are no longer valuable to others or to society? Is that what we can expect and then we die! Certainly NOT!

When I realised that my psycho-physical condition was changing and that I was not only getting better physically but also my thinking processes were improving and getting faster, I realised that this tool was extremely powerful. I had reached one very important turning point in my life.

I felt I had to share how this life changing tool would uncover people’s potential and therefore I started to use Alexander’s principles during the dance classes I taught. I was no longer teaching “Dance”, I was teaching students how to challenge their preconceived ideas about learning, about dancing, about thinking and most of all about themselves.

Today I train older dancers to become better dancers, but along the way they also become different people. One of my long standing students and a member of Counterpoint Dance Company, Almeric Johnson, says, “It changes your mindset about your own potential in performance and in life.”.

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On Wednesday I spent a day at Middlesex University as a visiting lecturer working with their 1st year dance students, looking at my work with older people in dance and what’s involved in teaching and training people at a later stage in their life.

This is the third year running I’ve taught at Middlesex uni on the topic and I decided to talk to this year’s students in a very different way than previously. I’ve been thinking recently about my practice and work with dance and older people over the past few years. This time I wanted to share something about myself that made an impact on why I do what I do.

I spoke to them about my training years as a dancer and how I was always the older one in the various courses I took when I was training. During my developing years I was alway “reminded” by others of the fact that I was older and that I could not be what I wanted to be. I loved Ballet and wanted to dance as a ballet dancer but my teacher in Sardinia took care to explain that “one becomes a prima ballerina by the age of 16”, of course this immediately put me out of the picture as I was starting at 18. However this did not deter me from wanting to dance and perform.

As I arrived in London I felt very out of touch and what I had learned back home in dance, ballet and jazz were my favourites, was very different here! I decided to take up contemporary dance as I had a feeling that this approach and style was the right style for my body and I wanted to see what was possible as well as enjoying some of the things I saw people doing. Still the stigma of ageing was there and younger dancers were always favoured, getting the jobs often because they could be a lot more physical than I could.

Having got to the point where I felt incredibly discouraged, I resolved to have nothing more to do with dancing. And that would have been that if it were not for some very persistent encouragement from my now husband.

I found myself teaching young people and children and later on older people. The more I heard people’s stories about how much they wanted to dance and saw them having a go, the more I realised how much I wanted to help them achieve their goals while changing the world’s views of ageing and who should be performing.

What I do today will hopefully help people that are struggling to keep going or to simply get started, some who’ve lost hope or who have been listening to the “establishment” and already given up, or others that have put dance and performance off because someone suggested they would be better off doing something else as they were too old to be dancers. I certainly draw inspiration from my students, as they prove time and time again that if you take the first step (get started!) and are willing to do the work, there’s a very high chance of achieving something wonderful.

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I was a late starter actually, although I had been very involved in sports, and had not thought about dance until I watched a film that changed my life, it was Flashdance! It was 1987 and somehow watching how the female dancer expressed herself through movement to the fast music had an appeal for me. A year later there was an audition in my school and I thought I would apply. I hadn’t taken any dance classes before and was almost 18, but encouraged by my rhythmic gymnastics teacher to “go for it!”, along with one of my school friends, who choreographed a short piece for me to the music of Flashdance, I went for it!

Well I passed the audition with flying colours and did the show and what that encouraged me to do was to take the study of dance seriously – so off I went so study ballet with the 12 years olds! I spent hours each week at the barre alongside some children who were nearly half my height! I certainly wasn’t the coolest kid in town and at that time I didn’t realise how well my teacher did by placing me with that age group. Of course now I can see how the solid foundation of ballet and starting the work from the beginning gave me a good foundation for what was to come.

You can watch the video of Namron below, who tells his story of how he came to dance and the sacrifices he made in order to follow his long lasting love.

How did you get into dance? Was it love at first sight or just a little bit of fun? And did you manage to follow your love for dance or did something get in the way? Join your fellow readers by putting your answers in the comments section below. It helps us all to learn from our shared experiences!

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We discuss how Counterpoint Dance Company are challenging people to thing differently about ageing and to reconsider the stereotyped iedas of older people, particularly in urban society, through the many performances we do throughout the year.

Click here to listen to the show and jump to 22mins & 30secs to go straight to the interview with me and members of Counterpoint Dance Company.

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This week… It’s been intense!

Dancers from various classes I teach came together to learn a new work for the Big Dance Project, produced by Sadler’s Wells & Cubitt Artists and led by Random Dance Company choreographers, rehearsing hours everyday.

One of the things I always notice whenever we work with the top professionals is how much they expect of themselves and others, mentally and physically. Of course this can create a problem when the pro’s come up against the keen amateur… Balancing expectations against skill and ability has been a great challenge this week but the result of that work has been astounding. (We’re probably on stage as you’re reading this if you’re not here with us!).

I’ve seen all the dancers involved this week step up to the challenge, with the first two days of rehearsals being the most difficult. The choreographers gave a lot of material to learn, some came from themselves, some was created by the dancers, all of it very challenging. And by the third day most of the dancers were pretty exhausted and to tell you the truth, I was not sure if everyone would make it to the end of the project! But the choreographers encouraged the dancers to keep on pushing forwards, certain that by the end of the third day they would be much better, even if they couldn’t see it in the moment!

And guess what?! In spite of some understandable anxiety and the physical challenge, they were! So the fourth and fifth day everyone was still tired but rehearsals started to flow, the piece was taking shape and everyone was more confident. Even through the tiredness the dancers were experiencing they had an energy that wasn’t there at the beginning of the week. Everyone was absolutely focused on the goal and committed to getting the piece right and the solos, duets and ensemble slotted right into place.

I am looking forwards to seeing the performance at Spa fields today and to enjoy the amazing piece that was generated by sheer hard work, sweat and some tears! And for those involved I know it’s been an immense learning curve finding out just how much we’re really capable of when we put the work in!

So I am looking forwards to the autumn classes as I now know how much students can and will do if encouraged to do so. Watch this space everyone!

If you took part this week, tell us what you found most challenging and how you managed to solve it!

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A while ago (way back before Christmas even!) I asked you the question “What is dance?” and you gave some fascinating answers in response. Today, many of you take part in classes with me that could be described as “modern” dance styles, so I wanted to briefly introduce you to the birth of modern dance (if you’re really interested, why not Google the names below and tell me what you find).

Modern dance began roughly at the turn of the 20th century, pioneered by Isadora Duncan, Loie Fuller, and Ruth St. Denis in the United States and Rudolf von Laban and Mary Wigman in Germany. Each were rebelling against the rigidity and formality of classical, academic ballet and against what they thought of as a banality in show dancing. Each modern choreographer looked to inspire audiences to a new awareness of inner or outer realities and break through the limitations of existing rules and definitions of the “perfect” aesthetics of dance.

I personally don’t think that ballet or show dancing are necessarily banal, superficial or artificial as I can see how they can both inspire and convey common and valuable ideas (and can be great fun too!) but I suppose that these pioneering choreographers (and dancers) felt the need to rebel against what they saw as an oppressive or unrepresentative “Status Quo”.

When I see many of you in class or performance I think there is some (or even a lot) of that rebellion against todays Status Quo, the one that says “only young people can dance” or “only young, “flashy” dancers are worth watching”.  It’s not true, so keep up the good work!  And if you need some encouragement, you’re in good company… Pina Baush agrees with you, older people are definitely worth watching!

If you’ve got a moment I’d  love to know what modern dance you’ve experienced.  Did it challenge what you think it means to express your ideas through dance?  How?  Let me know below…

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BUT… looking back now over the past year really helps me to put things in perspective, so I’ve listed below all the events and successes of the year that I’m really pleased to have achieved.  Enjoy reading or re-visiting these items and I’d love to know what successes you’ve had yourself this year.  Please tell me by  adding your comments in the comment box provided below.

And in no particular order…

Counterpoint Dance Company perform at the indigO2 arena.
It’s our largest venue to date and you can see a video short of the day’s events here.

Cubitt Artists commission me to create a short dance work.
In collaboration with their visual and sound artists I create a 15 minute piece performed by Counterpoint Dance Company inspired by the works of William Blake.  You can see some of the results here.

I teach a masterclass for 3rd year dancers at London Contemporary Dance School.
See the blog post here.

Counterpoint Dance Company make our debut trip to Edinburgh Fringe Festival.
A huge success.  It won’t be our last!  Pics and videos to follow.

Arts Council England fund me for my Migrations London Tour.
This is the biggest project I’ve under taken to-date, collaborating with another choreographer (Jane Judd) and creating a 50 minute piece for three dance companies including Counterpoint Dance with performances at three venues in London.  Here’s everyone in action.

I’m commissioned by A Million Minutes.
This was a very pleasing project hosted by the Alsen Day Centre for the Elderly where I worked with members to develop a public performance in response to their life stories.  You can see some of the results here and my A Million Minutes webpage is here.

Dance UK award me a place on their dance teacher mentorship program.
Very excitingly just before Christmas, Dance UK awarded me a place on their mentorship scheme that develops potential future leaders in the arts.  They’ll be providing me with funding, training and mentorship!  This all begins later in January so watch this space…

I’d love to hear from you and what your successes have been in 2013.  What’s one thing you are pleased to have achieved last year?  Tell me in the comments section below.

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Have you experienced loss, deprivation, and change you didn’t anticipate?  How did you respond to it? I’d really like to hear from you, so please share your thoughts and ideas amongst the community of readers in the comments section below.

Thanks for reading!

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Enter Maureen…

This is a play by Stephen Beresford that I saw at the National Theatre in June 2012, with a cast including, Julie Waters, Rory Kinnear and Helen McCrory.

The main character, Judy Haussman, an ‘ageing hippy’ matriarch, played by Julie Waters was presented as an eccentric but determined, free spirited older woman.

Judy has a serious health issue (melanoma of the skin), but as far as her dysfunctional family are concerned there is an equally important issue of inheritance to sort out.

Her ‘hedonistic, guru following, sexually liberated old junkie’ character (New Statesman), appeared in long flowing, fringed robes reminding us of her former trips to India. In another scene she wears a snoopy nightdress, possibly suggesting age has caught up with her.

Her long grey disheveled hair suggests her advancing years and ill health. The opening scene in the second act presents Judy as a frail, elderly lady tended to by her son. She wears large dark glasses and seems rather confused. It is brilliantly portrayed, with great pathos.

With a gradual return to reasonable health, we learn about the doctor’s mistake in over-prescribing her pain relief. Judy brushes it off, seeing it as one more acid trip whilst her family are outraged by the doctor’s behaviour.

Judy’s role as a relic of the sixties, hanging onto the ideals of free love, peace and revolution was scripted in a humorous and at times expansive form portraying an elderly person willingly trapped in a time warp of hippy trails to India with her children in tow.

Decades later, the reality is a neglected rundown house (in a very desirable area), swathed in Indian drapes, the dysfunctional family assemble. Had her unconventional parenting taken its toll on the kids? Questions embedded in the past are teased out as the family members try to resolve the contentious issue of inheritance.

I noticed some critics used descriptions that might be considered derogatory such as, ‘She’s a wrinkly but still has a determined free spirit’. (Independent)

I really liked the spirited, sometimes outrageous Judy Haussman character.

Oh to grow old disgracefully!

Maureen Brown

Tell us what you think in the comments section below.  We’d love to hear from you!

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